Current tune: leonard cohen - tower of song
"'Sal, think of it, we'll dig Denver together and see what everybody's doing although it matters little to us, the point being that we know what IT is and we know TIME and we know that everything is really FINE.' Then he whispered, clutching my sleeve, sweating, 'Now you just dig them in front. They have worries, they're counting the miles, they're thinking about where to sleep tonight, how much money for gas, the weather, how they'll get there - and all the time they'll get there anyway, you see. But they need to worry and betray time with urgencies false and otherwise, purely anxious and whiny, their souls really won't be at peace unless they latch on to an established and proven worry and having once found it they assume facial expressions to fit and go with it, which is, you see, unhappiness, and all the time it all flies by them and they know it and that too worries them no end."
I'd rather get stoned and listen to Wilco.
Two things I recieved A LOT of this Christmas:
Chocolate. Too much. Far too much. It's making me feel sick at the thought of it and I LOVE chocolate.
Lush products. Which, in my opinion, you can NEVER have too much of. Each one is different and I cannot begin to tell you how much I am looking forward to trying/using it all. My sister, amoungst others, bought me a huge box full of various items. One, smelling of cinamon, has been a mystery as to what it actually is. But, after a quick check at the website, I'm now aware of it's use - shampoo. Solid shampoo. I don't know how I feel about this yet, but I'll soon find out.
I feel a cold coming on. One side of my nose is blocked and I think I've broken a world record in sneezing. Plus my muscles hurt. It was irritating me all throughout my second Christmas dinner today. Delicious despite - as always.
A miniture selection from Paris:
sarah and i rarely call people by their actual names.
roland cartier. ricardo. sven.
1.lego bowl haircuts are really quite horrendous.
2.you know the kind of people that wear 'vintage'. not that kind where it's like 'oooo pretty dress.' the kind where it's like 'no you cannot pull off that chevron stripe faded eighties skirt jumpsuit with gold lame elephant shaped buttons down the front. that is also ridiculous.
1+2= disaster. it offends me. and i'm all for a piss take and comedy.
not much offends me.
my other hand is holding the phone
When I was eight I asked my parents if I could have my nose pierced. Back when I loved the Spice Girls and Mel C was 'so cool'. They obliged. They've always been kinda cool like that I'll admit. I also had platform trainers. And a t-shirt. Maybe the photo album and a keyring too.
But I find it interesting that America are so excited about the reunion when back in the nineties the girls couldn't really break the US, and over here we don't care as much, but they were huge back in the day. That probably, mostly has some direct correlation with Victorias popularity. I still find it amusing that it took her the best part of a decade, several bad records, 'comebacks', haircuts and fashion attempts to finally get what she wanted. It was America that gave it to her, then we followed. Now she's named an icon.
She's pretty hilarious. I'd quite like to meet her. We'd get along.
Her stylist should be knighted.
I ordered a shitload of products from Lush the other day for various family members Christmas. It was delivered today in a massive box stuffed with popcorn. I want to keep it all. My room smells fucking amazing.
I saw Ryan Adams (and The Cards) last week. Incredible. Last time I saw him he was fantastic and he was pissed off and wasn't even making an effort. This time was a different story. The guy is beyond talented. I could have sat in that seat for the entire weekend watching him play and wouldn't have been bored for a minute, even after his fifteenth ten minute guitar solo. Plus he was comedy and he brought out DJ Reggie for a minute which, in my opinion, was the icing on the cake.
Why am I in Scotland?
I need a new phone.
I adore Dolly Parton. She's so wise. I wish she was my gran.
The Paris countdown is currently at one week plus two days.
Bon nuit mon petit champignons
Last week 'ugh Brooklyn/i hate myspace/old man' Jesse played again. I couldn't be arsed seeing him again but I definately joined the girls, Tommy and the new band members for a light soiree via abc and some chat back in their l'hotel. It's a shame Steve wasn't there, due to his not being in the band anymore, but I shall see him next week in NYC anyway for a beverage or five.
Some others from random nights gone past I've only just seen:
(Trash Fashion/Art of Parties)
I feel like I should share my joy at having just eaten a banana fritter. It was beyond délicieux.
But it's not quite comparing to my joy at having New York next week!
New York 16th November. Can't fucking wait.
I'm so so so so so so so so excited.
I just purchased Vogue, i-D and Dazed and I'm going to make myself a cup of tea and have a good old swatch.
I'm going back to black.
My boss called me a seamstress today. I was not happy about that. Poor show mate, poor show.
So I did nothing but sit in the sun again.
My cat is doing a gymnastics move. It's hilarious and completely baffling as to how it's possible for a cat to sit and bend like that. I would explain it in greater detail but I'd bore us.
I hate when people show the back of clip-back bras when wearing low backed or backless stuff. It's so, so tacky. Almost as much as clear plastic straps/backstraps.
The man is fucking incredible.
I NEED those boots. Fucking amazing.
That's all y'all.
I put a cherry in the middle of each brownie.
No-one else likes cherries and, so after each person has devoured their delicious brownie as baked by moi, after having bitten carefully around the cherry in the centre, they then hand it to me.
"Here Zoe, you can have the cherry."
I want this:
Canon FS-4000 Scanner.
Go on, buy me it for Christmas.
and a Yashica T4Super.
really really really
i want to eat 8p noodles out of a blue pot
with a wooden handle
and sit on a couch that you can't help but slide off.
It's ridiculous how much pleasure I receive from my new little routine after work when I arrive at Central Station. I make my way into Marks and Spencer and purchase some Blackberry and Enchilblahblah (some herb) juice, before buying one of those Christmas Limited Edition Chocolate bars from Thorntons. Today it was the Fudge one, yesterday the Fruit and Nut, the day before the Orange, Cranberry and Nut ect. It sounds stupid but it really is amazing. Plus those two items are so tasty.
I do feel the need to illustrate:
I know. I dread the day that those chocolate bars are unavailable.
Oh, and I hate platform 11a. I really do.
And I have been cutting out coloured paper and sticking it down and doing presentations all week. It's hilarious, sometimes boring and always like being back in Primary School.
Wide leg trousers from Topshop.
Six am Hoobs watching.
The Christmas lights in Glasgow when it's dark at six pm.
Stealing Tanya's fingerless gloves.
My bag being full.
Wearing a felt hat in the hail.
Drawing in the train.
Bay windows and high ceilings.
That it may just snow very soon.
That Lucy doesn't have dog toys, she has 'friends' -Currently a sheep.
New Bloc Party.
Topshop being ridiculously overpriced these days.
Nervous people sitting next to me shaking and weezing.
People walking too slow in front.
The fact that I didn't buy those runched leggings and can no longer remember which shop they were in.
Sizing on hangers not matching that of the item which hangs from them.
Neds playing Happy Hardcore out loud from their phones on the train.
The smell of felt when it gets wet.
Do any of the staff at Heriot-Watt Uni actually work? Ever?
Of course I find myself talking to an answering machine again. They won't phone back either.
Can I not be done yet? Once and for all.
How much longer can this shite go on?
It was touch and go there.
I thought I'd lost my favourite shoes. Irregular Choice. Green and white. Wedge. My Alice in Wonderland shoes.
It's okay. I found them. In a shoe box tucked away underneath all of my other shoes.
I can relax now.
Justin Timberlakes' lyrics are astounding.
I think he needs to throw away that rhyming dictionary.
I really, really want one of those backless/halter hooded dresses from the S/S Gaultier show that's just past. They are amazing. I'll have those copper Balenciaga trousers too.
I had a look at mydeathspace. I didn't go to anyone's myspaces though. I don't know why. It's a little unsettling.
There are far too many gun deaths in America. Not that we didn't know that already but seriously? How do fourteen year olds even obtain firearms? There is something not right about that. Not that we didn't know that already. There are also far too many car accidents. Why are fifteen year olds allowed to drive in the US? There are also far too many car accidents involving alcohol — why are fifteen year olds allowed to drive in the US? There are also too many motorcycle accidents - I never want my dad or Tanya to go on one again. But I never did. There are also far too many young suicides. It's extremely sad and such a waste. How bad can it be when you are thirteen and you don't even give yourself a chance to heal and move on, or to just simply grow up?
It greatly annoys me, and it always has, that someone who is selfish enough to commit suicide in the first place could carry this further by placing the blame. What exactly is the point of making someone feel guilty for your life that you took yourself? Granted they may have a genuinely good reason, and I'm sure they do, but many of these [on mydeathspace] have taken their lives because a relationship has gone wrong/been cheated on, etc. No revenge is worth that. Surely you wouldn't do that to someone you love. Perhaps they are insane. You'd have to be wouldn't you? If even for a moment.
Only a small percentage are accidental and/or medical. The majority could have been prevented. The majority are caused by people. That isn't right.
The story of the girl who died of ovarian cancer, partly because she didn't have the medical insurance/money to pay for treatment really is very sad. Amoungst others.
How can anyone murder another human being with a hammer? Or murder someone they apparently love? Or their own children. That really is just insane. Properly insane. It's fucking scary.
As I'm on the subject of insane people, I forgot to mention something that scared the shit out of me the other night:
It was probably one am. Myself and Glenn were walking up a hill towards both of our homes before he turned left to accompany me the short distance to mine. The gentleman that he is. On this journey, there are many houses, then you pass a park, which is completely unlit and is very creepy at night. When we approached the very first house that you meet having passed the park, Glenn instantly whispered something along the lines of "Oh my god, do you see that? Fuck!". Bearing in mind, this was the night I was blind (no contact lenses), so I was thinking that I wouldn't be able to see, so I didn't bother to look.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Zoe. There's a fucking guy just standing at the side of that house, facing the wall."
"What!?" Then I looked. I wasn't that blind. He/she was wearing all black and it was a white wall. No mistake.
There is no explanation whatsoever to this story, or indeed any insight into this individuals strange behaviour. Perhaps he/she was going to burgle, was sussing out the area, and suddenly two people pass and he/she is shit at hiding, or camouflage, so he/she decides to face the wall. Perhaps he/she is insane. Either way it's fucking scary.
But he/she did not murder Glenn when he passed by again five minutes later. He/she was too busy still facing the wall.
I'm hungry. I want a korma and some Irn Bru.
It's not even funny how much I enjoy food. I'm so lucky that I have non-fat genes and a fast metabolism otherwise I'd honestly be one of those obese people who continue to eat various forms of fast/takeaway food, even though they really shouldn't, despite being so hideous. I had Chicken Chow Mein and 1/2 BBQ ribs from the Chinese takeaway again tonight. I seriously love that place. Perhaps too much. Then I heard an ice cream van. I was so excited I bought everyone in my house a double cone with a Flake and strawberry sauce. Delicious. Even though the actual cone part tastes like cardboard.
I drew this, and although I do hate starting something like this and not finishing it, it is somewhat finished in it's own way. That's what I'll tell myself anyway, otherwise I shall be forced to finish it properly. Anyway:
I do the same with books too. I don't know why. I won't pick one up unless I know I'll have the time/patience to finish it in one sitting. Unless of course it's crap, then I won't finish it at all because I won't feel compelled to. Valley of the Dolls instantly springs to mind as an example of the later.
Oh, I'm wearing a Spongebob night-dress that is actually a child's dress and I like it. A lot. I love it when his face takes up the entire area of whatever it's on. It always makes me laugh.